Definition:

In human sexuality slut shaming is offending and criticizing women for their sexual behavior, appearance or the way they dress. It is a social stigma applied to girls & women, who are perceived to violate certain traditional expectations, including requesting birth control. Slut shaming is also a common form of cyber bullying, mostly found on YouTube and Facebook.

So this means to give some examples, when females have many different partners they are considered as cheap and easy, wherelse if a man has lots of girls he is considered as a Ladykiller, Romeo, Playboy or Heartbreaker. He is congratulated for the exact same thing a women gets insulted for. Speaking in general many curse words adressed to women are strongly sexual orientated: Who hasn’t heard a woman being called a whore or a bitch, because she doesn’t fit in societys expectations of living her sexuality?

This phenomen goes back to our past where it was important for the human race to survive and the most effective way to assure that, was to sleep with the most amount of females and for them to make sure, that their partners don’t leave, so that those protect them and their baby. For that reason the typical role for a male human being is to have more different sexual partners than someone female would have. But why do we still expect people to act that way?

Nowadays we live in a world where we try not to act sexist and make differences between genders. We do not only have to survive anymore! In this time and age a woman should be able to get the same job a man has, get paid equally etc., so why are we getting attacked for having desires that are more sexual than society finds acceptable?

According to professor and author Amy Schalet “ignoring the fact that girls have a desire in sexual education, media and social sciences, results in girls having difficulty developing sexual subjectivity. Sexual subjectivity is feeling connected to e. g. boundaries and using them to make self-directed decisions.”

Journalist Emily Bazelon even says slut shaming is the opposite of being feminist: “calling a girl a slut warns her that theres a line: she can be sexual but not too sexual.”

monica

“The most famous victim of slut shaming is probably Monica Lewinsky”.

Slut shaming spreads into many, many different aspects of our daily life, like in the following 3 examples:

First of all Dress Codes in my opinion are discriminating and unfair, since they (in most cases) specifically concentrate on what females are or are not allowed to wear. If I‘m not able to show my naked shoulders, because it is “too distracting for the boys” (which I honestly don’t believe), THEY should be at home practicing self-control! But seriously though, if my wardrobe choices really had such an effect on my male classmates, then shouldn‘t it be their responsibility to controle themselves? I mean, we dont want any girl to get the impression she is guilty for a guys action, right? And, hey, who says male collar bones are not distracting me from learning? I want to have the same right my brothers have to go to school in a tank top or whatever, without violating dress code policies by dressing in  a “provocative” way or being slut-shamed. Our shoulders are the same with the small difference that mine get sexualized.

Secondly in the matter of rape & abuse crimes, victims are often blamed for wearing revealing clothing before refusing consent to sex and therefore being guilty. But that’s not what the crime was caused by! No one “asks for” being sexually assaulted and somebodys clothing is never an invitation! This topic has a huuuge slut shaming problem.

So I’ll just hide in my habit and everyones happy? Wrong! You simply can not please todays double standards in the dressing question, especially not in times with social media & co:

Dressing revealing equals being a slut,

Dressing too long = Boring,

Too much make up = Unnatural,

No make up = Unkempt,

Confidence is arrogance ….

So keep in mind: primarily this life is about liking yourself. While standing in front of your wardrobe and thinking about what to wear the next day you are forgetting the most important person and thats you not everyone elses opinion!

All in all I am shocked how normalized and omnipresent words like whore, hooker, hoe, and more are used as sexist insults, bringing us back to living in a cave. We have to become aware of this sexual unequality and stop using those words. Stand up against slut shaming!

 

Thanks to Raicha Sehe for her help!    hearts hearts

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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